I remember the many trips I took in the vastness of my mind,

The kisses I placed upon your lips and the love I hoped to find,

As I placed a soft hello into space,

With hopes to light upon your face,

As I tossed and I turned I cried out to you please never leave,

Although in my mind you were my life love and my only reprieve,

Everything that I am I give to you,

When you dream do I come through,

I’ve held you at night as you laid at my side but only in a dream,

When I kissed you goodbye did it feel as I hoped it would seem,

Did you cry with the same pain I felt?

A sad dream is what I’ve been dealt,

And I cry hello into the darkness of time and space with a tear,

Forever to travel space until one day you will hear me so clear,

And I pray it doesn’t come too late,

That you’ve forgotten our last date,

So worn and sore with aches desperately painful plus a lonely heart,

In the jungles of war you were in my heart as you were from the start,

As the only one that I have loved,

My heart is open and never gloved,

How your beautiful face in the night says hello to my heart once again,

Please never leave me, please stay eternally until our life’s can begin,

Everything that I love is second to you,

I have loved you forever written here true,

And now I lay in discomfort covered in snow afraid I could freeze,

Cuddled with you in my vision, I fall asleep in the cold with ease,

I’ve held onto a secret too long,

Loving only you is where I belong,

In a series of dreams I’ve stared backwards in time in search of you,

Will I ever be home, will I ever be warm after all I have been through,

I softly whisper hello so afraid I may sleep,

Cold has overtaken me I can’t feel my feet,

Everything that I love is in you with absence of your love I will die,

A frozen droplet of tear remains on my face as I awaken I still cry,

Hello in the vastness of cold,

In but a year I’ve grown so old,

Just this once I cry let me survive if only that I may dream once more,

As I finish my prayer I whisper aloud, hello I love you, it’s you I live for,

I beg to stand before you ready to weep,

It is of you I survived, your love to keep,

How I pray to survive the cruelties of man and return home to all,

Yet I question survival as I have fought all alone, since came the call,

I cry in the darkness where are they all,

If but a moment the pain could stall,

Abuse has overtaken my mind as sodomy penetrated what I am,

I now understand the greatest sin cast upon women by a man,

Any innocence that remained is gone,

The child of my past has passed on,

In a garden in heaven youth of my soul has been laid to rest,

I cry for the child of me that tried to do as told and did his best,

Now I will never again be whole,

The evil of man penetrated my soul,

On a damp dirty floor with my waste on the floor they did their best,

To empty my soul of love and hope, but my love of you had yet to crest,

In shame I cried for my mother,

Words I wish I could smother,

In a moment of cowardliness I cried like a child wanting Mama there,

For her to kiss my forehead then to hold me as she gave me her care,

In a vision I saw you ever so plain,

I’m so ashamed I cried your name,

Every weakness I have came forward in time and I exposed what’s inside,

I’m not a brave man filled with courage and so ashamed your names I cried,

I bleed until I faltered at death’s door,

I’m so sorry I couldn’t take any more,

Hello, can you hear me Patti, I fear this is my last journey into space,

You will receive a box of my dreams for you if I don’t leave this place,

It will be given my daddy and he will hold you,

As every letter and poem you read through,

I’m no longer a man as I’m damaged beyond repair this time I fear,

In a blink of my eyes I’m in a bed learning to walk and can see clear,

The kindness of a nurse brought you to me,

Recovered your photo that you I’ll see,

In a moment in time all I had been through was a nightmare of past,

Hello, my heart is crying please never leave me, don’t leave so fast,

As you left me my heart filled with fear,

And I whispered goodby with a tear,

With a wave of goodbye everything that I love drove off far away,

Another wave of extreme loneliness to live through until the day,

That you say hello once more to me,

And with my eyes it’s you that I see,

You may never know that each night I told you goodnight in a rhyme,

For so long I’ve whispered my love poems into the vastness of time,

I would cry into the emptiness each night,

And dream of holding you so tight,

The times of extreme are now etched in my face to be seen by everyone,

As I walk towards your smile a hidden tear says the loneliness is done,

Everything that I love is at my side,

I walk from it all with you as my bride.

The end, to Patti, from Pat. November 1967 to November 7, 1970.